mercer, valora anne.

[valora]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, background-color: #EEEEEE, border: #59b1ba 5px solid; width: 400px; height: 500px;] hey there. the name's valora anne mercer! i go by val too if you were wondering. also i'll have you know that i am 21 & loving it. oh. you've heard that I'm heterosexual? & that I'm from santa monica? well the rumors are true for once. well I gotta get going, school is calling. see ya'! bee tee dubs, i'm a student. history, "well, let's see. i'm not a very exciting person- i think i'm really boring and my past doesn't exactly differentiate that, sadly. Anyway, okay. Here we go. I was born in Santa Monica, California. It's gorgeous there and it was never cold. My mom was in her third year of college when she met my dad and he never went to college. He was in some band and i don't even remember the name right now, but i remember him singing to me when I was little and he wasn't that good. So i guess it's kind of a good thing he gave up on his musical dream when i was born. My mom was studying to become a psychologist and i sort of got in her way so she dropped out to help raise me. They like to tell me i was a bit of a brat when i was a baby. I guess i would throw things or whatever and knock stuff over. But they hired this really mean nanny and jesus christ, she was strict. both my parents worked really crappy jobs and the nanny would yell all the time and this was all around the age when i was six. she would steal stuff from the house, like my moms make up and she even hit one of our small lamps in her purse. She would say I broke the lamps and that i would ruin the make up so she'd 'throw them away.' Because her purse was totally a garbage can. My dad eventually found out what was really going on and fired her, but not before one last raid. She stole a bunch of my stuffed animals and i don't even know why. She didn't have kids..i don't think. and if she did, god bless their souls. i hope they grew up okay. Anyway, my parents started fighting a lot because we were tight on money and it turned out my mom was pregnant again so things were gonna get even more worse. I'm not gonna lie. I was a pretty jealous little kiddo. If someone had a pretty shirt i'd want it and have a tantrum and even one time i tried to rip this shirt off a girl. it was a cute white shirt with strawberries and smiley faces and i just had to have it. I was an angry kid. I was 10 at the time and my mom and dad decided that, even though it would be a lot of money, i should go to therapy. I thought that idea was half retarded with a sprinkling of stupid and a side of dumbassery. (Not in those words though. I was like, 10.) My therapist just said I was an angry kid and that taking up some sort of sport to let the anger out would hurt. I took boxing because I could hit things, and then my mom went into labor after that. My dad got a better job and the money flow started to become better and my mom even decided to go back to college. It was great. Until i started to get bullied in high school and i was failing all my classes. I was with the wrong crowd. Imagine me, 15 now, being pushed around at school. You'd think cause i took boxing i'd be able to hold my own, right? Well, yeah. I beat their asses. But it didn't end and i just..started to get sad. all the time. Have you ever thought that if you just kill yourself, life will suddenly be better? But you'd be dead. And it wouldn't get better because you're not alive anymore, you can't do anything. I didn't know why i was so sad, but my mom took me to several hospitals and therapists and they all sad the same thing. "valora has clincial depression." Depression my ass. I just felt weak, I guess. I started to..scratch. that sounds weird. i'd be forced to wear long sleeved shirts and then i started to cut, and i didn't feel safe wearing anything. i thought they'd all see it and think i was stupid. that i was weak and just..i didn't like it. so when my mom found me in the bathroom with a razor and a cigarette, she got me help. not even that bullshit help, like the depression pills. but actual help with people i could relate to. i wasn't sad anymore. it was freaking great. now i was 18. i was going off to college to study, like my mom, psychology. it seeemd to fit after everything that happened. and i've been going to college since then and now i'm 21. i work a part time job at starbucks to make ends meet for college and food and i gotta say, my life is kind of great. I still feel like reverting back to my old ways, but i'm stronger now." personality, "I already said it. I think i'm boring. I go to college and i study psychology. That's like, the epitome of boring if you ask me, but it's totally cool, i like being boring. Boring is my life and basically my essence. Okay, so, there are some good points to me. I love to draw and i think it's a really good way to manage feelings and it's a good way to vent. That's what my first therapist said to me and that sort of stuck. I'm not exactly a loud person or anything but i'm sort of that "oh well if you get to know me, i'm a cool loud person!" type of girl, even though that's really cliche to me. I can actually be really sarcastic. Actually, it's a funny thing. I use sarcasm to cover up when i'm hurt or when i'm feeling down. It's sort of like a barrier, actually. I hate being wrong and if you point it out that i am wrong, i'd probably reply with something like "you know what else was wrong, your mom when she said your dad would pull out. boom roasted." oh sweet jesus, that isn't even sarcastic or rude. it's just stupid. i'm a stupid person. I can't stand feeling weak or needy. So, that's why i've been single all this time. Never once have i had my first kiss or you know, first time or anything. I think i'd be a clingy drunk so i don' t drink either. I love romance, though, which is ironic because i won't date anyone. When i was younger, i self harmed. and i can't stand knowing that if something happens, i can go back to that. so i stay way from people. i'm scared." appearance, "I always loved to dress up. I'd hide in my moms closet and wear her dresses and i still love dresses. i think i have more dresses in my closet than i do shorts, jeans and shirts. but on a typical day, you can catch me wearing jeans and a cotton tee shirt with a hoodie or cardigan on or something. i hate the cold and so i tend to bundle up a little too much in the winter. before you call me a hipster, i have some advice: don't. i like to wear old school shorts and shirts sometimes and big poofy hats, and i'm not gonna lie. i love uggs. they're cheap and warm. i also love to take pictures, but that's sort of besides the point. I tend to shop at forever 21 or the thrift store, really, anything i can afford. i can actually still fit in some clothes from when i was younger, so i wear those too. my mom never picked my clothes out for me. she liked these weird things, like weird textury shirts or whatever and ruffles and bows. that doesn't float my boat, dude. people tell me i have really pretty eyes. i don't agree. they're like, a dirty blue/brown and it's sort of strange. they're kind of mixed and it's a really gross looking color if you ask me. i'll usually wear my hair down in curls and oh god, i dye it all the time. blue, green, half brown and blonde like i have right now, you can bet i've dyed it that. my natural color is brown though. anyway, yep. unlike my personality, my appearence is bold." the roleplayer, aw hi i'm allie and i'm 14 yes i know i'm like a baby wah you're all like, 16. but um i live in michigan and it's really cold but it isn't snowing and it's making me mad and i have been rping for like a year now and anyway hi c:

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