baby please don't go - [STARK]

[abigail hayden winchester]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=cellSpacing,10,true][atrb=style, height: 30px; background-color: #056E3F; width: 425px; font-family: arial; font-size: 10px; letter-spacing: 2px; color: #F2F2F2; text-transform: uppercase; text-align: center, bTable]yeah, you got me begging, begging baby please don't go

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=cellSpacing,10,true][atrb=style, background-color: #F2F2F2; width: 427px; margin-top: -20px, bTable] IF I WAKE UP TOMORROW, WILL YOU STILL BE THERE? Abi couldn't believe that she was doing this. That she was actually going to meet up with someone that she'd met from the internet. In all reality she'd been such a shut in since her husband died that this was a step she knew her sister would say she was taking in the right direction. Her sister was always telling her how she needed to start living life again. That she needed to get back on her feet, meet new people, stop locking herself in her house with her videos and pictures and reliving a life that she would never have again. It was hard though, to let go, to move on, to actually put herself out there when she felt like in doing so she was betraying the man that she loved. Stark though, there was something about him that made her feel comforted. She'd been talking to him for a few months now, first just ims and emails. When they first started talking on the phone they'd stayed up all night that first night. It was strange for her to talk to someone like that again. To just open up and be real and honest with someone, let them know exactly how she was feeling. What she was thinking. And the more time that went by, the more that she found herself using him as some sort of emotional rock, the more the desire to actually meet him grew. She was nervous though, because, well, she didn't know what to expect. For all she knew he could've been some old man trying to pass for a man her age. But, she wasn't letting herself think that way. And maybe this was all too good to be true to be finding someone that she could actually care for, that she could actually have some kind of connection with, but fuck, she wasn't going to just pass it up. Marco wouldn't want that. He would want her to find happiness again, even if she herself was sure that she would never be able to find happiness like she'd had with her husband. She called him the love of her life for a reason. If nothing else though she was comfortable with Stark. In a way that she could talk to him for hours, or she felt like if she was having a bad day she was able to call him and tell him about it. So the day had finally come for them to meet, and to say that she was nervous was some kind of understatement. It was nothing serious, nothing that was going to be any big kind of deal. Just the two of them meeting up for coffee at one of the local cafe's. A coffee date seemed so much more simple than going out on an actual date, but lord was she nervous. Her entire stomach was filled with butterflies and for the longest time she just couldn't figure out what it was that she was going to wear. She didn't want to get too dressed up, but neither did she want to seem like she didn't care enough to look nice. Abi'd finally decided on a pair of jeans and a nice blouse over a tank top. She'd let her hair dry naturally in a sort of wave and put on just some simple mascara and eyeliner. Nothing too big. Nothing too dramatic. Just right. At least that's what she'd hoped. With one last deep breath she left the house and then made her way to the cafe. Abi ordered her drink before taking a seat at the table that she'd let him know she was going to be at. Her eyes glanced down at her phone to check the time. She was early, he wasn't late. Though, part of her hoped that he'd arrive a bit earlier too. Abi had never really been a patient person. WORDS: 652, TAGS: liv/stark, NOTES: SPUFFY TEMPLATE BY CREEPY DOLL @ CAUTION

[james andy stark]

To say that he was nervous was the understatement of the century. He was so nervous he was almost feeling a bit nauseous. Over the last couple of weeks, hell even months, he'd been talking to this girl. Her name was Abigail and they'd got in touch through the internet and they'd just been talking about everything and anything for that entire time. She knew a lot about him, more than most people he had been in touch with since his so called death. Even his family thought he was dead, they'd been notified as a safety precaution to them. Anyway, now he was going to meet her for a cup of coffee, and he was nervous. He wasn't exactly known for being a good, straight forward, regular guy. He wasn't sure he knew hoe to be a good date. For most of his life he'd been a drug dealer, a druggie and a drug transporter and that was the world he knew.

Sure he'd told Abi about his darker side and the fact that he'd recently started trying to quit his bad habits. She even knew about the car crash and the fact that he was supposed to be dead, maybe that wasn't such a good idea but he felt he could trust her. In turn, she'd told him about losing her husband and she would talk to him on her bad days. He'd be lying if he didn't admit he'd fallen for her, hell he'd even go as far as say he'd fallen in love with her. With her personality that was, because he hadn't actually seen a picture of her. Which was another thing that made him nervous, he didn't know what to expect and what she'd look like. Not that looks ever really mattered that much to him, but still, it could be a bit awkward. Looking in the mirror he ran a hand through his yellowish white hair and straightened his deep blue sweater. He looked alright, but then again it wasn't as though he'd ever really had this kind of a date and it made him unsure of himself.

Finally he grabbed his jacket and started heading towards the cafe they had agreed meeting at. She'd explained to him what kind of a table they'd be at and he'd said he'd wear the blue sweater and of course his black trench coat. Turning around he locked the door to his crappy apartment and started heading out, clutching the small amount of money he had, damn he hoped he'd have enough to actually pay for what they got, it'd only be right since it was after all a coffee date and wasn't the guy supposed to pay when it was a date? Well he'd at least have to spend what he had and then see where that'd get him. Since he was unemployed now it was hard for him to have a lot of money to spare after all. Oh well he wouldn't worry about that now, he'd worry about getting there in time and maybe bringing her some flowers as well. He couldn't afford buying any, but he could start picking some, so on his way there he walked through the park and picked some wild flowers until he had a good bouquet.

Once there he took a very deep breath before he headed in through the door, however he hadn't been expecting what met him. When he looked around to find the table he'd been told to go to, he spotted Abigail. However he almost stopped and ran out of there the instant he saw her. This was Marco's wife, or rather, it had been while he was alive. There was a lot of bad things to say about Stark, but he never forgot a face. This was definitely her, he didn't know it but he turned quite pale. How had he not known this? The similarities in their stories with the car crash and all, he should have put the pieces together. Sighing heavily he mentally shook himself, even if it was her, he couldn't just walk out of there and away from her without at least saying hi. It would be so rude, and he didn't like the idea of standing her up, so letting a deep breath out in a sigh he prepared himself and headed over to the table.

"Hey Pet" he said, walking up to her, trying to look his normal unfazed self. A smile firmly planted on his face as he held out the flowers in an offering to her. "I'm not late?" he hadn't thought he was,but then again as he'd walked in it looked like she'd been there a while already and that was troublesome if it meant he was late. Hell he really just didn't know what to say at this point, he was feeling all weird about realizing who she was, and he was still to be fair looking a bit pale even if he didn't notice that himself. Once he'd given her the flowers, he took a seat opposite to her, wondering if she'd noticed he was the guy who she thought was to blame for her husband's death or not. Maybe sitting down hadn't been the best idea now that he thought about it, but it was too late now.

[abigail hayden winchester]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=cellSpacing,10,true][atrb=style, height: 30px; background-color: #056E3F; width: 425px; font-family: arial; font-size: 10px; letter-spacing: 2px; color: #F2F2F2; text-transform: uppercase; text-align: center, bTable]yeah, you got me begging, begging baby please don't go

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=cellSpacing,10,true][atrb=style, background-color: #F2F2F2; width: 427px; margin-top: -20px, bTable] IF I WAKE UP TOMORROW, WILL YOU STILL BE THERE? if she were to stop and think about it, she would realize that this was almost insane what she was doing. it wasn't like she'd met him in come chat room for those that had lost someone, or something like that. she hadn't met him on a dating site because lord knew that she would never in a million years join one of those things. even if it meant being alone for the rest of her life, which had been her plan anyway. stark had come to her from such an unexpected venue, such a place that she never would've thought to meet someone that she would actually want to be with, for that thought had crossed her mind, and sometimes wasn't it the best things in life came when you were least expecting them. that's how it had been with marco, and maybe that's how it would be again with stark. someone coming from left field, without her even knowing how to prepare for him, and then changing her world in the blink of an eye. the man who was she was going to meet that day had already gotten so much further than so many people in her life with getting her to open up and talk about things. she didn't hold back when it came to him. she just told him everything that she was thinking and feeling right when she was thinking and feeling it. there were no walls. no hiding behind secrets. all that there was, really, was abi opening up completely to him, a faceless man who knew all of her deepest and darkest secrets. a faceless man who any moment now was going to have a face and become real in a way that he hadn't even been made real when she'd first heard his voice on the phone. it was easy to talk to someone you could convince yourself you'd never see, but now, here she was, planning to meet him. abi would've been a liar if she were to say that there wasn't a moment where she'd considered just getting up and leaving. where she thought that maybe she couldn't go through with it because maybe once she saw him, knew that he was a person, and god forbid if he was as attractive as he sounded, there was no way that she could continue to be open with him. she would clam back up. hold things back like she did with everyone else, even the people who had known her for most of her life. it wasn't that she wanted to do that, but she was afraid that she would. it was easy to shut out the world, easier than letting it in. and part of her realized that she needed stark. she needed to have someone to talk to about these things. the blonde pushed the pessimistic ideas from her mind and instead focused on how this was supposed to be a good thing. a happy thing. a thing that would end with, if nothing else, a best friend that could give her a hug on those bad days. eyes lifted from her coffee cup to look around the place and it was the bouquet of flowers that caught her eyes first, held in front of a sweater the same color that stark had told her that he was going to wear. her heart skipped a beat as eyes traveled up to his face. he was more than attractive. he was more than she had been expecting when she had first arrived at the cafe. no one ever expected to meet someone who was actually this beautiful when they were meeting up with someone online, but here he was. his cheek bones defined, his body fit, and his eyes. she felt like she could melt just at the sight of his eyes. "hey," she greeted her voice a big breathy as she took the flowers from them and then brought them to her nose, eyes closing for a brief moment as a dreamy smile took over her lips. "no, you're not late. i have a problem with being obnoxiously early to most things. punctual to a fault, my sister always says." those hazel eyes of hers turned to look at him again, that smile not moving off of her features as she drank in his appearance. "you're....not at all what i expected." WORDS: 733, TAGS: liv/stark, NOTES: SPUFFY TEMPLATE BY CREEPY DOLL @ CAUTION

[james andy stark]

His smile never faltered as he sat down in front of her, or as he looked up at her to see her reaction. Sure, maybe it was wrong of him not to say something right away about who he was, but he knew that by doing so he'd shatter the idea that he'd been driving when the car accident with Marco had happened, and he really didn't want to shatter her image of him. Nor did he want to loose her, he realized, as he looked into the gorgeous eyes. A small chuckle left his lips as she stated he wasn't what she'd expected. "You're not exactly what I expected either" he confessed, though the smile on his face said that at least looks wise he wasn't disappointed. However he was a bit freaked out by the fact of who she was, and even if he was doing a good job hiding it, he looked a little unnaturally pale. "Not that this is a bad thing of course" he added, the smile warming a little, because he couldn't help it, even if he now knew who she was, well he still loved her. It may be a bit weird to say that since he hadn't met her face to face until a moment ago, but he did.

"Well I'm glad I'm not late, I would have hated to keep you waiting, I picked those on the way here though, I know they're not roses, but I thought maybe they'd be nice." he said, trying not to put attention to the fact that he hadn't been able to afford roses no matter if he'd wanted to or not. This way it hopefully seemed more of a thoughtful gesture rather than a way of saving money. Oh hell, now that he knew who she was he was feeling more nervous than he had been before leaving home and his stomach was clenching uncomfortably, however he'd be damned if he was going to let her see that, no he was going to act normal and friendly and just try to pretend he wasn't sitting in front of the wife of the cop who'd died while with him. The thought made his already clenched stomach tighten even more. "Yeah well, I generally tend to be on time as well, but sometimes time passes a bit quicker than I'd expected it to." he admitted.

Honestly, that sometimes was usually when he was doing drugs and had just had a new dose. Which honestly he'd done before coming here because he hadn't wanted to get issues with withdrawals while here with her. That would just be absolutely shit for both of them. "You look nice" he added, almost as though he'd wanted to say it right away but had forgotten because he'd been distracted by the other things he'd been saying, it was a lame comment but then again who was he kidding? He was no good at this stuff and he likely never would be either. Running a hand through his hair, he studied her, expecting her to recognize just who he was any moment now. "How are you feeling today?" he asked gently, it was something he always asked when they talked, whether it was through the phone or ims or even e-mails. After all, he knew she often had bad days and he wanted her to know he'd listen if she needed him to.

"Do you want something to drink or eat?" he then asked, trying to keep conversation rolling so they'd not have to deal with that whole awkward silence thing, because honestly they shouldn't need to deal with that considering the way they'd been talking lately. That and well, he had promised her at least some coffee, right? And he'd be damned if he wasn't going to give her what he'd asked her if she wanted to come there for. He'd been here a couple of times and he knew that they had some pretty amazing coffee, even if she'd been the one to pick the place. Suddenly he found himself wondering how many times they might have both been here at the same time. This place tended to be a bit busy and so it would be easy enough for them not to see each other while here. Maybe they'd been in the same room more often than he'd known? Then again, would he have thought any more about it than wanting to stay away from her so she wouldn't rip his head off?

[abigail hayden winchester]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=cellSpacing,10,true][atrb=style, height: 30px; background-color: #056E3F; width: 425px; font-family: arial; font-size: 10px; letter-spacing: 2px; color: #F2F2F2; text-transform: uppercase; text-align: center, bTable]yeah, you got me begging, begging baby please don't go

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=cellSpacing,10,true][atrb=style, background-color: #F2F2F2; width: 427px; margin-top: -20px, bTable] IF I WAKE UP TOMORROW, WILL YOU STILL BE THERE? Abi wasn’t aware that you could feel so much for someone that you had never met in person before. That your heart could beat fast because of them, that you could feel like a girl in school all over again without seeing that person’s face. She remembered just about every day she’d been excited to come home to get an e-mail from him or even call him. So much that surrounded him just made her feel so much, so many things that she’d never thought that she was going to feel again. Seeing him, though, finally getting to lay eyes on this man that she already felt so much for before she had even seen his face, it was causing her heart to race. It was causing her smile to stay right there planted on her full lips. “No, not a bad thing at all,” she agreed as her eyes stayed on his own. She cared deeper for this man than she had ever realized and something about having him right there, close enough so that she could touch, made those emotions in her go insane. Butterflies fluttering around in her stomach, her breath caught in her throat. It was easy to get lost just staring into his eyes. A light chuckle came from her lips and she nodded in understanding. “They’re wonderful. Really, just, so thoughtful. So many people would’ve just brought roses, but this, it shows that you actually thought about doing something more than just buying something from the store,” she said before bringing the flowers to her nose again and she took a deep breath. “They’re wonderful, thank you Stark.” Her hand then reached across the table to take a hold of his for a moment. The contact caused a jolt of electricity to go through her. What were these feelings? She almost couldn’t believe that she could be feeling like this again. Those little shocks of electricity from a touch, the breathlessness, the butterflies, she never thought that in her life she’d be feeling this way again and yet here she was with this beautiful man who she had been talking to for months, and he was proving to her that maybe, just maybe, it was possible for her to move on with her life and find happiness with someone else. The blonde let her thumb run over his knuckles for a moment as she looked at his hand that small smile on her lips. Eyes then traveled back up to his face, to look into his eyes. Was he really here? Was he really sitting there in front of her? Was she really holding his hand? Abi almost couldn’t believe that it was real, that she was actually getting to be around this wonderful man that she had grown to care so much for. This man who had been there for her in ways that no one else had been since her husband’s death. After one last squeeze she let her hand return back to her lap. “Happens to the best of us, but, don’t worry. You’re on time,” she informed him with that reassuring smile. A light blush took over her cheeks at his compliment and she pushed some of her hair behind her ear. “Thank you. You look nice too. That color is very fitting for you,” she complimented. When the question came a light dreamy sigh left her. To be right there, hearing him ask her how she was like he asked her every time that he talked, but somehow, it was better now. Because if she needed to fall into his arms she could do just that. If she wanted to cry his shoulder was literally right there for her to soak her tears into. But Abi didn’t feel like doing any of those things right then. Right in that moment, she was too happy to think of being upset over anything. “I’m great,” she answered simply. And it was the truth. She was here, with Stark, and there was nothing in the world wrong in her life. At least, not for the time being. Abi nodded slightly at his second question before standing. “I’d love just a cup of coffee,” she informed him. When most people looked at Abi they probably thought that she had some sort of complicated drink, but in all truth, the blonde was happy with a cup of black coffee. Maybe the years of being married to Marco had caused a few things to stick. WORDS: 750, TAGS: liv/stark, NOTES: SPUFFY TEMPLATE BY CREEPY DOLL @ CAUTION

[james andy stark]

It was impossible not to stare into her eyes, they were so gorgeous and she was looking at him with that smile on her face. It took his breath away and it made his heart beat faster than he ever thought he'd felt it had. It was weird how she touched a part of him he'd thought untouchable. A part he'd long since thought to be dead. As she reached out and touched his hand the smile on his face warmed even more and he almost thought his heart was going to explode out of his chest. He felt like he'd had some sort of electric shock, but a good one and it moved from his hand until it filled him and all he could do was focus on that wonderful, slightly tickling feeling, it settled as butterflies in his stomach, and even though his stomach was still clenched nervously because of who he knew she was, well it felt nice to sit here with her and her touch was so comfortable, so wonderful.

A soft, happy sort of sigh left his lips as her thumb moved across his knuckles and he gently squeezed her hand in return before she let his go. "good, because I wouldn't want to keep you waiting. Thanks" the last comment was in response to her complimenting his sweater. Of course he wasn't used to getting many compliments in his life, at least not from someone as nice as her. It made a tiny hint of pink creep into his otherwise so pale face. "It's one of my favorites" he commented, referring to the sweater in general, of course what he failed to mention was the fact that he didn't have very many sweaters to choose from. Oh well he wasn't going to think about that now, he was going to fully focus on Abi and her wonderful smile. He could tell that she was actually truthfully happy when she said she was great, there was no lie or doubt in her voice, today she truly was happy.

Her happiness kept the smile on his face, nothing would ever take the smile off his face as long as she was happy. Somehow, deep down he knew this to be fact. Shaking his head a little he gestured at her chair as she got up to stand. "No, you go back to sit, I'll get us something to drink" he said gently, secretly very relieved that all she wanted was black coffee because it would actually allow him to be able to buy it for her with a little left over to spare. He'd get himself some water and maybe, just maybe one of those tiny over priced cookies. His stomach grumbled at the thought, he hadn't had a proper meal for a while, in the battle for money, drugs always won the war. Food just didn't seem quite as important. Heading up to the counter, he ordered some coffee for her, a glass of tap water for himself and a cookie, that if she wanted to, they could share.

Before he knew it, he was back at the table, and again she knocked his breath away. Soon he had the cup placed on her side of the table and the water on his, the cookie in the middle. "Do you want half?" he asked gently as he took his own seat and leaned back, not in an indifferent or uninterested sort of way, just in a relaxed way, she'd know by now he didn't relax very often, but for once, he was utterly and totally relaxed and comfortable. "I didn't get to talk to you yesterday, I had some stuff to do, but did you have a good day?" again he was asking about her well being, it was all that had occupied him lately when he wasn't too drugged to care. Thankfully she had a tendency to call him around the same time of day every day, so he knew when to be clean enough to be worth talking to. He hated himself for the weakness he had when it came to drugs, but he wasn't sure he'd ever be able to stop. It had been such a big part of his life for an incredibly long time.

[abigail hayden winchester]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=cellSpacing,10,true][atrb=style, height: 30px; background-color: #056E3F; width: 425px; font-family: arial; font-size: 10px; letter-spacing: 2px; color: #F2F2F2; text-transform: uppercase; text-align: center, bTable]yeah, you got me begging, begging baby please don't go

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=cellSpacing,10,true][atrb=style, background-color: #F2F2F2; width: 427px; margin-top: -20px, bTable] IF I WAKE UP TOMORROW, WILL YOU STILL BE THERE? he was so sweet, really just so much sweeter than she ever thought that she could find in her life time. maybe it was because she had never been with anyone besides her late husband, both sexually and romantically. he had been her one and only, and for as much as she had expected he was going to be the only man that she would be with for the rest of her life. but, life had thrown her a curve ball, and now here she was with this man that she felt so much for, but couldn't understand it. stark was great, he was kind, and he was sweet, and she really had no idea what she was supposed to do. she hadn't been on dates, she had just been with marco. but this, it was so much easier than she'd thought it was going to be when she had finally agreed to meet up with him. just being with him was simple, and abi found herself loving it. with each passing moment any sort of nervousness flew from her leaving her just being content. the smile on her lips didn't leave them and she didn't figure that it would be leaving them anytime soon. for the first time in a long time she was able to just be happy, to be content and let herself be alright with her lot in life. she didn't have her husband anymore, that was true, but she did have this friend, a friend that she never had seen coming. a friend that could very well become so much more than a friend if that was what time wanted to happy between the two of them. it was certain enough that abi wouldn't be complaining if it ended up with them being more than friends. hell, she would probably be happy about it. "i can see why, it looks just, great on you," she complimented, her eyes taking in his appearance again with an approving smile on her lips. she was quite sure that there wasn't a lot that he wouldn't look good in though. just his bone structure alone was amazing and took her breath away. her brows raised when she went to stand and he told her to stay seated and the smile spread her full lips again as she returned to her seat. her eyes followed his form as he went to get their drinks. a dreamy sort of smile stayed on her lips as she thought about the man who was standing only a few feet away from her. he was almost too good to be true. fingers lazily twirled her hair as she waited for him to come back and her features held a dreamy sort of smile. those hazel eyes turned to look at him when he came back to the table and they held the gaze of his blues. "thank you," she spoke softly taking the coffee in her hand and taking a drink. her eyes went to the cookie as he was breaking it and she nodded taking the half from him and taking a bite. "you know, i really don't understand why they charge so much for these things. for the price of one you can make a dozen i swear," she stated with a bit of a chuckle before taking another bite. her teeth moved to sink into her bottom lip for a moment as he asked the question. it was rare that the two of them went without talking to each other at least once a day any longer, though, she had missed hearing from him. "it was an alright day, nothing really all that exciting. i taught a few classes then went home and made dinner, watched a movie, talked to my sister. it was a good day, i guess. i missed talking to you," which she really had. it was just a part of her day to talk to him now. and she found herself missing him when she didn't talk to him. WORDS: 672, TAGS: liv/stark, NOTES: SPUFFY TEMPLATE BY CREEPY DOLL @ CAUTION

[james andy stark]

Just watching her was really something he thought he could do for the rest of his life. She was so beautiful, absolutely perfect, so he kept his eyes on her as she took a sip from her coffee and then accepted half of the cookie. It took everything he had to let her have it, he was so damn hungry it wasn't even funny, but of course he would do his best not to show her that. "Yeah? I guess that might be true, or at least I'll take your word for it, but making them yourself would require you knowing how to bake" he said and chuckled, making it more than clear that he had no idea how to make cookies. She was right of course, the cookie had been massively expensive, at least for his extremely tight budget, but that didn't change anything, he'd even have bought her food here if she'd wanted some. It would have taken every last penny he had, but it would have been worth it.

"Personally I'm not much of a baker, or at least I don't think so, I haven't really tried it much" he confessed and again a chuckle left him. The only thing he knew he was good at was being a criminal and selling drugs. Not something he was about to bring up and definitely not something he was very proud of. In fact, it was difficult for him to be here and act like model citizen. It wasn't something he was used to and he had to constantly remind himself not to curse every two seconds and to try to keep his way of speaking in line. He took a small bite of his half of the cookie and it was all he could do not to just stuff it all in his mouth and swallow it without chewing. Methodically though he took small bites and made sure to chew them for a good while before swallowing, alternating between the bites of cookie and small sips of water. After all he didn't want her picking up on how hungry he really was and the fact that he couldn't really afford getting more than the cookie.

A frown crossed his features though as she said she'd missed talking to him. He'd missed talking to her as well, but his desperate need for drugs and for not getting it from the local dealer in fear of being recognized, well it had taken over and he'd been out of town all day in the hunt for more drugs, now he had a decent storage at his place, but it had left him with no money at all, or well at least not much. "Yeah I know, I'm really sorry, I should have made more of an effort to call, but I had to go out of town for a bit and I got back really late" which was the truth. There was no lie in his words, but he had of course left out what he'd had to do. By now his hands were ever so slightly trembling, because the amount of drugs he'd taken before coming here was minimal, and it was wearing off a bit faster than he'd expected.

"I promise I'll make more of an effort to next time I need to go out of town" he said, looking genuinely sorry for the fact that he'd missed their daily call. However once he'd gotten home he'd been so desperate for a hit that he'd ignored everything else. "I'm glad it wasn't a bad day though, and I'm sure it was nice talking to your sister?" he said, trying to keep the conversation off of himself and as soon as the cookie was done he placed his hands in his lap so she wouldn't notice them trembling. Damn he was such a fucking mess of a man and she deserved so much better than him. The thought made him feel useless, honestly it was true though, she deserved better and why she liked him so much even after the stories he'd told her about his life was a wonder to him. He managed to keep his smile up though and had another sip of water. It didn't help, of course, that she had turned out to be Marco's wife, or well technically she wasn't anymore since he was gone but still.