YOU AND I - {jason}

[peter geoffrey ashton]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, width: 340px; background-image:url(http://i583.photobucket.com/albums/ss279/legendskseeker/fk5qwnjpg.png); padding: 30px; border: #a0a0a0 solid 30px; ] we whisper words when we're alone at night OUTFIT CLICK TAGGED FOR LIV/JASON BABIESS~ he wasn't sure what brought this on. he didn't know how long jason had had this ring, how long he had been waiting for this moment. he said that it was before the fight, before the play, so it had to have been a while ago since their fight had been rather extensive in length. which meant that he had gotten it before he knew that peter was afraid that sometimes he was just a game to him. which meant that he had gotten it before he had something to prove. which meant...which meant that he cared, which meant that he wanted this. which meant this was genuine. happy tears rose in his eyes as he watched that ring slide onto his finger. he honestly never, ever thought that he'd see this day. if they ever got engaged, he assumed jason would tell him that they had to keep it quiet so no rings. and they wouldn't have a big wedding if they ever had it at all. and that even then no rings until he was ready. but this...this was better than anything he had ever expected from jason. and he loved him for it. he loved him for being so unpredictable at times. and then there was another box and it dawned on peter that this...this was more serious than he realized. this wasn't just jason staking a claim. this was more than just a way to remind him that he had something special. this was mutual. this was something that jason wanted both of them to have, a way to show that they were one another's. "i hope you want to see it as...well an engagement of sort." an engagement. an engagement. more than a promise of being his boyfriend, more than saying it was more than sex, more than just showing up at auditions. this was something real, an actual representation of their love that everyone was going to be able to see. on his finger. on jason's. whether they told people what it was for or not or if people just figured they'd both finally found someone...he didn't care. jason didn't care. this was...this was real. what he never thought would happen was happening. he took the black velvet box that jason handed to him carefully, as if handling something precious. which he was. god there was so much he was holding in that little black box, more than a promise and more than something that must have cost his boyfriend a pretty penny. he was holding their love, their secret, their...everything, everything that they had been building for the past twenty years. he held their laughter and their fights and their kisses, every "baseball game", every time they cuddled, every moment they'd ever been embarrassed in front of each other. he held in his hand the past three years of calling him his boyfriend, the past five years of being his boyfriend, and the past twenty years of their friendship in the palm of his hand and then with slightly shaking fingers he lifted the ring from the box and turned it so the heart was facing toward his boyfriend. "i love you," he told him quietly before kissing him and slipping it onto his left ring finger. he thought there was something more he should say. a big long speech about how much it meant or at least that he was so happy or something that could equal what jason had just given him. but he couldn't find the right words. he could only deepen his kiss, leaning further into him as he placed a hand on his chest. he felt....he felt perfect. like everything was finally just the way he felt like he could live with. that they could live with. he pulled back only to beam at his boyfriend, smiling brighter than he knew was possible. "i feel like i should be saying something," he laughed, kissing him again softly. "like 'with this ring' or something like that. but i can't find the right words. you took them from me." he chuckled quietly. "just..i love you, jason. i know we fight and i know i'm not always perfect and i'm sorry that i'm just so...needy and clingy and...everything." he smiled. "but you are everything to me. everything. my today, my tomorrow...i wouldn't know what to do if i didn't have you. and now i know i'll never have to know." he kissed him again. "i love you, jason. and this is a promise, my promise, that i will never take off this ring. ever. it is...everything to me. you are everything to me." i want to hear them in the morning light

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TEMPLATE BY KHRISTIAN @ CAUTION 2.0, LYRICS BY GUNGOR

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[jason elijah rowe]

Jason almost couldn't believe that it had finally come down to this. That he was finally able to get the right words out and that Peter had said yes. Not to marriage exactly but to an engagement that would last however long it took him to get to the point where or if he'd be comfortable with letting the world know he was gay. Well honestly he didn't know if he was gay, or bi, or even if this might just be a Peter thing and not a general sexual thing. It had always been Peter for him, no one and nothing else. So he couldn't really say for sure if he'd ever have fallen for a girl if it wasn't for Peter or if he'd still just be interested in other guys. Fact was that he'd never really been interested in anyone else the way he was with Peter. Sure he could see both men and women as good looking, but couldn't everyone? That didn't necessarily mean one would want to play 'baseball' with any of them did it?

His heart was beating so fast he thought it was going to beat straight through his ribs, and he couldn't stop smiling as Peter took the box from him and proceeded to slide the ring onto his finger. The kiss that followed was so intimate, so filled with love and happiness it was overpowering and it wiped away any bit of nervousness he'd been feeling a moment ago. Sure some of the light queasiness was still there from before, but he didn't much notice it. In fact, all he noticed was Peter and the guy's lips on his own. It just felt so good, so secure to know that they were engaged. That they'd always belong to each other. It was a promise he took very seriously. There was no way he would ever break this promise, not unless Peter asked for him to and he hoped that would never happen. Yes, they had massive fights at times, but what couple didn't right? And adding to it the fact that they had both been taught to think loving each other was wrong, he thought they were doing pretty damn well actually.

"You don't have to say anything Peter, you've already said the one word I wanted to hear. wrapping his arms around Peter again, he pulled the guy as close as he could and just held him close, loving the feeling of his fiance in his arms. Fiance.. God that sounded so wonderful in his mind. "I love you too Peter, always have, always will. No matter what I'm not going to be taking this ring off, never." he promised again. It was one of the things he could do for Peter to reassure him that he'd never leave him. It was something he wanted to do. It was something he'd wanted for a long time but not had the guts to do. Sure, maybe he was a coward when it came to their relationship, but he couldn't help that, however he could make sure Peter would never ever again feel like he wasn't going to always be the most important person in his life.

"Yeah, sure, we fight, but I'm sure everyone does. The fact that we keep making it through them though is what makes us special. Besides I wouldn't want you any other way than the way you are. I'm not exactly perfect myself. No one ever is completely perfect, but I love you, even with the minor flaws. Not that I think you have a lot of flaws that are troublesome anyway. You're always here when I need you and you know me better than anyone else. I would never want to lose that. Not for any reason." he said, placing small kisses between his words on Peter's neck and shoulder. He knew they couldn't go play 'baseball' or anything like that right now, they had class soon, but at least they could enjoy another few moments together. "I'm glad you wanted to be my fiance even if I can't promise it will get to marriage any time soon, but that doesn't make this any more of a permanent promise. You know that right? Besides, we don't need a paper to tell us we're going to be together for the rest of our lives, because I already know we will."

[peter geoffrey ashton]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, width: 340px; background-image:url(http://i583.photobucket.com/albums/ss279/legendskseeker/fk5qwnjpg.png); padding: 30px; border: #a0a0a0 solid 30px; ] we whisper words when we're alone at night OUTFIT CLICK TAGGED FOR LIV/JASON BABIESS~ engaged. engaged. engaged. he tried the word out in his head a few times and it put one of those giant, goofy grins that he was so famous for on his face. he never thought that he and jason would reach this point. never. he knew he was going to be with jason in some way, shape, or form for the rest of his life but engaged? that was something else entirely. not that people wouldn't say "about time" if the two weren't so secretive about their relationship. he could almost hear elvis's laughter, as if somehow his friends who had been so suspicious of him and jason for so long could hear now that he was engaged, how he'd laugh and ask how long they'd been keeping that a secret too if only he could just...know for sure that peter was gay. because if peter was a girl and jason was his boyfriend, with the way they'd grown up, with how in love they'd been from such a young age, people would have expected engagement a long time ago. they would have counted on it, and though it killed peter to admit, if he was a girl, it probably would have made life that much easier. so the very fact that he had gotten here with him. the very idea of being jason's fiancé...it was amazing. it was perfect. it was...wonderful. even if he knew it might not get farther. even if he knew that he might never get to a wedding chapel with his fiancé. even if he knew that this might be the farthest that jason was willing to go this was farther than peter expected for...years. it was just proof of how much jason had grown throughout the years, how much he had loosened up since peter first started dating him. maybe other people would find it stifling that jason still didn't want to come out but peter could understand that. what people who were looking at it from the outside wouldn't understand, though, was that jason really wasn't as stifling as peter sometimes made him out to be in his mind. he did things like this - like giving him a ring that everyone would be able to see and though peter wouldn't necessarily tell everyone it was an engagement ring, it was obviously so much more than something he inherited from a family member or friend. it was something that told people that he had somebody - it wouldn't tell them who it was but that doesn't matter because he knew that the other ring was on the finger of the man he loved and that...that was all he needed. that was all the freedom he'd been looking for. a chance to show the world who he loved, to tell everyone that he wasn't on the market without having to point a finger at who it was. and jason had given him that. maybe his fiancé claimed that he wasn't good with all of that intuition shit, maybe he claimed that peter knew him so much better, but that was a lie and peter knew it. jason knew him just as well as he knew jason and if his boyfriend had any worries about how to calm peter down, this was definitely the most effective solution. it was enough. "i know you do," he grinned when jason said that he loved him too. and he did. god he did, and sometimes he felt so stupid for pushing him to love him more, love him more, love him more. jason loved him the way that he loved jason: with every fiber of his being. and he proved it in the things he'd been doing as of late - the audition, sticking with the play, and now this, giving him something that he could wear publicly. he knew jason loved him; he was stupid to ever doubt it. because it didn't take a moron to figure out the pair of them were in love. hell, how they managed to hide it all these years was a mystery to him save for the fact that he was a giant, affectionate idiot and jason was a better actor than people ever really knew. hell, even one of peter's best friends was catching on and he'd known elvis for a much shorter time than he knew say, his sister or jason's cousin, and they weren't even aware that there was something romantic there. everyone knew there was something there. best friends who had a connection no one could even begin to try and understand. but they never suspected love and it honestly blew peter's mind. it was crazy what you could hide behind a religious shield. "i think you're perfect," he smiled, letting out a soft, contented hum at the feeling of jason's lips. "even if you may adamantly deny it. it's all those things you claim are flaws that make me find you perfect. maybe you're not flawless, jase, maybe no one is, but you're perfect to and for me and that's all that matters." he pulled him up for soft, loving kiss. "and if we get married two years from now or ten or if we never get married at all...it doesn't matter. as long as i have you, jase, then boyfriend, fiancé, husband...it doesn't matter. i love you. that's all i need." i want to hear them in the morning light

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TEMPLATE BY KHRISTIAN @ CAUTION 2.0, LYRICS BY GUNGOR

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[jason elijah rowe]

Jason was happy, but he was also exhausted. This day had been one hell of a roller coaster and no matter how happy he was at the moment, he was going to be exhausted for the rest of the day. He wanted nothing more than to go back to their room and just cuddle and sleep. Even 'baseball' was as far from his mind as it could ever get, he was just tired and lectures, working out for football and stuff didn't seem like a good option at all today. Ignoring it though he pressed another few kisses to Peter's jaw and neck as he listened to the words his fiancé was saying. Well he didn't believe he was as perfect as Peter was saying he was, but at the same time he wasn't about to start an argument over something so silly as whether or not he was perfect. He knew he wasn't and that was all there was to it really. Lately he'd been a horrible boyfriend but he was going to try his best to change that trend and be a bit better for Peter, while still keeping his sexuality hidden from the world of course.

"I love you" he muttered and leaned down to kiss the finger the ring was sitting on. "And now you'll never forget that, because you have proof right here" he said and kissed the same place again. Hell he wanted to go back to their room so bad it was almost painful, but really it wasn't an option. He'd recently skipped some workouts to hang out with Peter and he couldn't skip more without making people seriously suspicious. Also there were classes to attend and music to be written. It wasn't likely that he'd end up coming back to their room until really late that night. "I wish we could just go back to the dorms, but I don't think I'll be able to get back there until really late tonight. I've got so much crap I need to finish and I can't skip another workout or I'll not be fit once football season starts back up" he said with a small sigh. He was already exhausted and honestly he wasn't quite sure how he was going to manage to get through all this for the next few weeks until the musical performances. He'd bitten off a bit more than he could chew, and he needed to practice some of the more, draining songs before bed as well.

"I hate to do that tonight, you know, but there's just too much that needs to get done for me to be able to come in early today." he added, it was more than clear just how much he regretted not being able to come back there early and just hang out. Sure they got to spend more time together with this musical but it also took away a lot of their personal time in their room. Half the time they were both so exhausted they just passed out in each other's arms when they got to the room and as nice as that was, it wasn't the same. The little bottle of GHB that he still had sitting in his nightstand had been bothering him too. He'd been meaning to get rid of it, because the last thing he wanted Peter to do was to find that bottle containing more than a lethal dose sitting there. Of course it would freak Peter out if he found it, the guy may not be into drugs, Jason normally wasn't either, but he was sure Peter would have some idea of what it was if he found it.

The last thing he wanted was another fight because Peter found it, but he hadn't really been in their room much without Peter lately. Not since they'd made up from their last fight. He didn't want to risk making anything worse again. "I just want to stay here for forever" he whispered through the kisses he was still lavishing on Peter. Taking comfort and strength from the love he knew was there, somehow he was going to make it through the rest of the day, and then he was going to find Peter in their room and at the very least cuddle. If Peter was still awake maybe he'd even try to initiate a baseball game, regardless of being absolutely exhausted. They both needed it, and honestly he wanted to celebrate the fact that they were no longer just boyfriends but fiancés. It felt so good to finally have had the guts to do what he'd wanted to do for weeks and to know that Peter was happy about it, really happy about it. It meant the world to him.

[peter geoffrey ashton]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, width: 340px; background-image:url(http://i583.photobucket.com/albums/ss279/legendskseeker/fk5qwnjpg.png); padding: 30px; border: #a0a0a0 solid 30px; ] we whisper words when we're alone at night OUTFIT CLICK TAGGED FOR LIV/JASON BABIESS~ love wasn't perfect. their love wasn't perfect, and shit, peter knew it better than anyone. if there was anything that he could be sure of after all the shit that he'd been through in his life, it was that. love wasn't perfect, and he and jason were definitely not an exception to that. if anything they just proved it. they fought - hell they fought probably more than they needed to just to get frustrations out because there was only so much energy that sex could take out of you. they fought and they didn't always get along and sometimes they went without speaking and sometimes jason flirted with other people to keep up appearances and peter spent his time being crawled over by other people to keep up his own and sometimes it was just...it was hard. it was draining and it was scary and sometimes it felt like it'd be easier if they would just...fall out of love and live life as the heterosexual men they pretended to be. but love was also rewarding and it was beautiful and it was everything that he needed in the world and that - that was why they didn't do that. that was why every day, it was like falling in love with jason all over again, each moment just as exciting as the last and the ones before that. it was why they did settle down at night together to cuddle, why there was always one bed that was more made than the other because they rarely slept alone, why most nights ended with a game of baseball that was just enough to tide peter over until the next time they saw one another. because love was exciting and love wasn't ever old, and he was so in love with jason and so familiar with being in love with jason that he couldn't think of a moment when he wasn't in love with the man. he could only remember being young and being in love with jason and being a teenager and being in love with jason and being an adult and being so in love with jason that it was almost physically painful. and that...that was enough for him. just sometimes it wasn't easy. moments like this, though, made it easy. moments where it was jason and him and a beautiful mix of lips and hands and touch that he couldn't get anywhere else. the feeling of jason kissing the ring that he had just put on his finger was enough to send his heart racing and the feeling of his lips made it hard for him to focus on the fact that jason was right - they did have other things to do, classes to attend, prior obligations that needed their attention. but fuck it if he really did want to go. he'd rather stay in that room forever cuddled up in jason's arms, feeling the slight pressure from his lips on his jaw and his neck, moaning quietly and contentedly at the feeling until he had gotten his fix and felt it right to share his boyfriend with the world again. he knew he couldn't; neither of them could. but it was tempting to try just to see how long they could occupy the classroom until a professor or janitor came by and kicked them out. "i understand," he said quietly in response to jason's explanation of his busy schedule. and he did understand even if it didn't exactly please him. he had things to do, too. a screenplay he owed rupert. sketches for a set, assistance to give to the kids who wanted to build it, costume decisions, lighting and make-up references and then of course his songs to rehearse. and he couldn't forget that he owed a paper on greek theater and also a research paper in psychology which he had refused to drop even after they had told him it wasn't necessary. they both had things they had to do, and he understood that jason couldn't be with him forever. even if he wanted him to be. "i love you, too, jase. and we'll just...we'll make up for it when you get back, okay?" he kissed him and pulled away smiling. "and as good as forever sounds, we have the rest of...well, forever to stay together." he kissed him again and pulled back to hit his jaw, his neck in turn. "besides, if you keep kissing me like that, you're just going to drive me insane and then neither of us will be very productive." i want to hear them in the morning light

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TEMPLATE BY KHRISTIAN @ CAUTION 2.0, LYRICS BY GUNGOR

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[jason elijah rowe]

Oh God how much he wanted to just stay like this forever, with Peter wrapped closely in his arms and just everything so perfect, but their little bubble would have to burst and they would have to go their separate ways and do the things the world required of them. When Peter mentioned they could make up for it when he got back that night he smiled and kissed the guy back. "Great minds think alike, I was just thinking that myself. Once I get in, we'll make up for it with either cuddles or well, whatever that leads into. Maybe I can manage to get some time to grab us something nice to eat on my way back as well" he said and then felt his eyes drop shut as Peter started attacking his neck and jaw the same way he'd been attacking Peter's a moment ago. A moan left him and he immediately felt some stirring at a very different spot. This really wasn't the time for him to get that kind of reaction, and he tried to remind himself of that but it didn't really change anything.

A laugh escaped him at Peter's comment about neither being very productive. "Yeah, see, I already have that problem" he laughed, knowing Peter could likely tell more than easily enough. "But you're right of course, it's going to have to wait because class starts soon and if we both don't manage to get a hold of our hormones I imagine classes can get very awkward for the both of us. The bell's gonna ring soon and that would be, well a little.. embarrassing." he said and it was clear that he wasn't thinking the embarrassment being that both of them would have issues but more the idea of walking around with that issues in a hallway full of people, not to mention some of the girls that would most likely latch onto him with offers of helping him get rid of that problem. No it wasn't something he wanted right then so they needed to cool down just a little bit.

Pressing another few kisses to Peter's neck and throat and then lips, he finally, very reluctantly pulled back and supporting Peter's shoulders to he wouldn't fall back when he got up, slowly managed to get to his feet, and he was right, his little... problem.. seemed more than a little obvious to him. Another laugh escaped him. "Well would you look at that, so obvious it's almost painful isn't it?" he asked and reached down to offer Peter a hand to get up if he wanted it. "I really do love you..." his tone went from joking to dead serious in an instant and it was clear he was still feeling quite emotional both from the play rehearsal and the proposal, but he was happy, there was no doubt about that, his eyes were shining of happiness as he glanced from Peter's ring to his own and then back up to Peter's eyes. "And I really can't wait to come back to our room later and spend some time with my fiancé" he added, a grin spreading on his face as he said the word out loud. Fiancé, engaged, they were engaged. The more he thought about it, the wider his grin grew.

Once they were both on their feet, he pulled Peter in to an embrace again, this time there was no hint of sexual tension aside from the obvious, it was more of a loving hug than anything else. He just loved Peter so much it was almost all consuming, but he didn't mind that it was. They weren't perfect, they argued a lot, but at the end of the day he really would rather have that than not have Peter at all. Peter meant way too much to him for him to even want to consider living without him, the bottle of GHB sitting in his nightstand was enough proof of that. Ugh no, he wasn't going to think about that bottle now, there was no reason to, as soon as he got a chance to he was going to get rid of it, flush it's contents down the toilet or something of the sort. "I hate to say it, but we really will be late for class" he said with a small sigh and placed a small kiss on Peter's lips before pulling back a little and taking a step back as he let go of their hug, and as he did the bell rang. "Shit! We're already late!" he said and leaned in to place a quick kiss on Peter's lips again. "I love you Fiancé of mine. I'll see you tonight!" and with that he hurried out the door.