you tell me im a wreck., DEAN

[charlotte]

Vanessa stood, shaking. She hadn't meant for this to happen, she hadn't meant for anything out of the ordinary to happen. But this..well it was too late now. She slid down, back against the door. Her stomach felt queasy, her heart beat could no doubt be heard miles away. But it was too late to change anything. Her eyes fell upon the little stick, her mouth had become dry. The little pink plus sign was all the indication she needed: her life was officially over....

Vanessa thought of that moment as she knelt over the toilet, her brown hair pulled back into a rather messy bun. She hadn't ever imagined that she would be THAT girl. The girl everyone talked about, that slut that hadn't been capable of containing herself. She thought of her mental state, how she was without her medication at least, and it frightened her. Could she really take care of a baby? She closed her eyes as her breakfast came up, her body shaking as she held herself up with her arms. She couldn't help but want someone to hold her hair, to love her through all of this. But she'd blown that chance.

After she was certain her stomach was 'empty', she stood. Her legs, agani, were shaky but she managed to make herself walk back towards her bed. All day at school she had been somewhat distant, primarily because of the nausea, but this was unreal. She still had her outfit on, her pink skirt and her baggy sweater...hell even her pale pink pumps remained on her petite feet as she lay immobile on her bed. She lifted her shirt slightly, looking down at the slight bump. It wasn't overly noticeable yet, she just looked bloated. No one thought any of her strange behaviour, the bonus of being relatively new to the area.

She reached for her phone, texting the only person she really knew she could depend on to keep this a secret.

Dean.

Come over?

She huffed silently, placing her hand gently on her belly. She was determined to get through this, to overcome it and become the mother she honestly never had. She didn't want her child to be raised by nannies, she didn't expect her daughter or son to witness cheating or lies. She just wanted them to be happy. She closed her eyes, setting her phone beside her and waiting for his reply, praying inwardly that he'd come spend time with her.

words; 419
outfit here.

[dean joseph singer]

dean wasn't the most social of butterflies. he wasn't the sort of boy who went around making a lot of friends, or spending a lot of time with people. he spent most of his time in his dorm room with his piles of books and his school work. with the things that made him more of a nerd than anything else. sure, he knew that some girls found him attractive. the way that he would play his guitar or things like that. but when you got into the reality of dean's personality, he was the best friend that a girl could ever have, but so many hadn't thought to make him more than that for one reason or another. which, dean was more than fine with. he liked being there for his friends. to hold their hands, to be their crying shoulder, all of those things, but that didn't mean that it didn't suck when time and time again he watched his chick friends get boyfriends and he once again would be looked over.

nessa was just another one of those girls in his life. he adored the girl. hell, he had slept with her on a one night stand which was something that he never did. there was something about her, though. something that just made him smile, made him feel like there would be something more than just a one night stand between them. what that something more ended up being a friendship. once again he had been tossed into the friend zone and there wasn't a damn thing that he could do about it even if he wanted to. it wasn't so bad, though, being friends with nessa. at least then he could keep an eye on her. make sure that she was alright. that she didn't end up with some ass hole who didn't deserve to lick her shoes. he felt something for her, something stronger than he should, he knew, given that he was the best friend. but wasn't that just the perfect set up for so many teen romance movies?

he'd been in the middle of reading when the buzzing of his phone stole away his attention. it wasn't often that he ignored a book for his phone, but right in that moment he had a feeling that it was a text message that he was going to end up wanting to get. marking his page he scanned over it, a simple two words, but it was enough to place a small smile on his lips. his friend needed him. and even if he knew it was just as a friend, that didn't stop him from smiling. because he missed her. he didn't get to spend tons of time with her given that they lived in different cities. with a bit of a skip in his step he gathered his jacket and shoes and made his way towards the door, then down to his car.

he tried to make the drive as short as possible as he made it towards nessa's home, and after marking he took the front steps two at a time up to her place then knocked on the door. not to get her to answer it but instead to let her know that he was there. with a quick turn of the key in the lock he made his way inside then towards her room. "nessa? you in there?" he spoke into the door in a sweet tone before knocking on it lightly.

[charlotte]

Keeping all of this a secret was nearly killing her. She felt as though she was drowning in lies, pretending her life was completely normal. She couldn't help but set her phone away and start crying. Her stomach was getting larger, her nausea was becoming more frequent, and the fact that no one knew was physically painful. she groaned, feeling another wave of nausea arising. Yes, i'm in here she mumbled, sliding off her bed. She tugged open the door and threw her arms around him. She felt somewhat weak, primarily because she'd spent the past our throwing up the little food she had managed to consume. Make this stop she whined, jotting out her lower lip slightly.

She pulled away from him and walked back towards her bathroom, taking her spot on the cool marble floor. She leaned over the white bowl and waited. She was certain it would come, after all...nothing had stopped it from coming at all during the day. She needed to tell Dean, at least then she'd have someone willing to come with her to appointments and help her get through it to some extent. Whether she wanted to admit it or not, She felt something for Dean. Something somewhat beyond friendship, more towards passionate. The one night stand had happened, but she'd thought little of it.

She sat up some when she knew the wave of nausea had been a false alarm. She put her head in her hands for a moment, what if Dean was the father? She shook her head, without saying a word. No. There was a list the size of the charter of rights with men that could potentially be the father of this child, and she wouldn't put that kind of pressure on the one person she knew would step up the minute he knew. She sat there, not wanting to move too much, biting down on her lip. Dean? You're kind of amazing for driving all the way out here to hang with me she said softly, looking up at him with clearly conflicting eyes.

Nessa leaned back against the wall, keeping her eyes on him. fuck, i'm an idiot she groaned, closing her eyes as she said it.

words; 380
outfit here.

[dean joseph singer]

if there was one thing that dean disliked more than anything else it was seeing one of his friends in pain or sick. which was exactly the image he was displayed with when nessa opened the door and threw her arms around him. he wrapped his own long limbs around the young woman pulling her close for a moment. "what's goin' on sweetheart?" he asked his tone gentle as always and he moved to let his hand move over her hair in a soothing motion for a moment before she let go of him and was off to the bathroom.

now dean had met a lot of women, a lot of his chick friends, who didn't like to throw up in front of other people. he wasn't sure where nessa stood on the whole thing but with how she was speaking he couldn't let her go in there alone. he followed her into the bathroom, kneeling down beside her so that he could gather up her hair and hold it away from her face. it wasn't something that a lot of guys would do for their friends, he was more than sure of that much, but he wasn't just some guy. he genuinely cared and sometimes that meant having to do things like this. he was more than happy to do it. a sympathetic look painted his features as she moved away from the bowl and leaned on the wall.

dean took a seat beside her, letting one of his arms wrap around her shoulders and pulling her into his side gently. he didn't know how to work with words most of the time. and the young man was convinced that he quite often said the wrong thing. but gestures like this. comforting motions in which he could put an arm around her, or press a soft kiss to her temple. these were things that he could do and he knew that they were safe things to do. all that he wanted to do right then was make it go away for her. a light chuckle passed his lips and he pushed some hair out of her face tucking it behind her ear. "it's really no big deal. you know that i'm always here for you nessa," he said simply with a soft smile painting his pout.

brows pulled together, though, at her words and he tilted his head to the side slightly. how could she be an idiot? that didn't make sense. "ness, it's just the flu or something. how does that make you an idiot?" he asked because sometimes dean really wasn't the brightest bulb.

[charlotte]

Something rather loving passed through her as she listened to Dean. He was so naive. Any other man would have instantly assumed the worst, instead he assumed it was just a flu. It was exactly this reason that Vanessa knew she had to tell him. She was already two months pregnant, while she'd just discovered it she'd already gone to the doctor. She had one image from an ultrasound hidden in her dresser, the baby didn't look anything like a baby yet. It sort of resembled a little alien, but Ness wasn't really ready to share that with him. She took a deep breath, closing her eyes again. Its not a flu, babe. she stated simply, clearing her throat. Her words sounded forced, she was definitley not comfortable talking about her current condition.

She looked at him, as if hoping he would understand without her having to utter the words 'im pregnant'. Her soft hazel eyes scanned his, hopeful and anxious all at once. She put her hand against her slightly bloated stomach. You can't tell anyone. Not yet she mumbled, assuming he'd understood. She was beyond terrified...but not that Dean would ruin her. Dean was someone she trusted, someone she knew she could depend on to make her feel loved. My parents don't know, neither does my sister....if any of them found out they'd flip out. Especially after whats happened the past few years she stated, forgetting he had no idea she was bipolar.

Vanessa stretched her legs out, groaning inwardly. This was anything but ideal, this was ridiculous. Of all the girls to have had unprotected sex...why her? She smiled, thinking of what he had said to her. He was right, he was always there for her. When she had the baby, she had every intention of making Dean the godfather, if anything where to happen t oher he was exactly the man she'd want to take care of her baby.
words; 380
outfit here.

[dean joseph singer]

dean was smart. when it came to books, and math -especially math- and anything that had to do with the logical part of his brain. the kind that made him great at math and things of the like. but when it came to people, when it came to simple interactions. things like deductions about people from their actions. or getting hints. he wasn't good with things like that. he really wasn't. maybe that was why he wasn't good with women. why he hadn't had but a handful of relationships that didn't last on his romantic roster. either way, the idea that she might be pregnant didn't cross his mind. not once. even when she told him it wasn't the flu all that happened was a confused expression took over his features and he tilted his head to the side. if it wasn't the flu what else could it be?

then the look on her face told him something that he was slowly getting. and it wasn't until her hand moved to rest on her stomach that it really clicked in his brain what it was that she trying to get across to him. that look of realization took over his expression, and brows made their way right up to his hairline. this, was not what he was expecting. and there was a moment where he just looked at her with a sort of shocked expression, his head still tilted to the side and his mouth hanging open. then she was speaking again and he closed his mouth and let the most supportive expression he could muster take over his features. "oh nessa," he said softly and pulled her closer pressing a kiss to her forehead again her petting her hair. he wanted nothing more than to comfort her. to make her feel less unsettled about this all.

"i won't tell anyone, i promise," he said softly and for a long time just held her. he couldn't imagine how scared she was. how alone she was probably feeling. the fact that she was scared, and so alone in all of this. all it did was make him want to be there for her as much as was possible. even if it was just holding her hair back when she was throwing up. "hey, i'm here for you. for all of this. if you need someone to come with you to appointments and stuff, i'm your guy. anything you need. even if it's running to the store in the middle of the night because you're having a craving." his tone was soft as he spoke and he pulled her closer for a moment. "i promise i'm here for you. always."

[charlotte]

She allowed him to pull her closer, thankful that he cared so much. She sniffled, trying her hardest not to cry. I'm just so stupid she whined softly, cuddling into him. I don't even really know who the father is. She mumbled, leaning her head against his chest. This was weird. She knew she cared for him, and she knew that there was something between them that felt more comfortable than friendship, but she didn't know what it was or how to act on it. Or even if it was returned.

She looked at him, chewing on her lip. you really don't mind being here for me? she asked softly, her eyes searching his. She couldn't even fathom why he'd want to spend his next nine months doting upon her. It was terrifying alone though, but she knew that it would be worth it in the end...with Dean helping though, she was significantly less scared. She leaned in and pecked his lips somewhat innocently. You're amazing, Dean. she stated softly, blushing at her own actions. She didn't really know what else to say though, what words could she use to express her undeniable gratitude for his being in her life? the relieved euphoria that surrounded her was inexplicable, so she didn't try to talk. She just leaned her eight on him, letting him play with her hair.

She wondered absently if he even let the thought of the father cross his mind....after all, they had had sex not that long ago. She closed her eyes, biting down on her lip. She kept reviewing the list of men she'd slept with, trying to place them on a time line and associate them with the baby in her stomach...but there were too many for her to really know. She groaned in frustration, pulling her legs close and hiding her face. Frig. she sighed, swallowing hard. She refused to start crying in front of anyone, not even Dean.
words; 380
outfit here.

[dean joseph singer]

dean wasn't an idiot, he might've been naive to a lot of things, but he was in no way an idiot. true enough, he might turn a blind eye to the somewhat questionable things that his friends did. ignore the fact that one friend cheated on tests. and with nessa ignore the fact that she slept around. he loved her no matter what she did with her life. he really did. and he thought being a true friend meant that no matter what a person did, you stood by them. so, when she said that she didn't know who the father was, it was unfortunate to hear, but at the same time, it was something that he almost thought fit. after all, he had been one of those one night stands and if it weren't for the fact that he so adamantly pursued a friendship with her, he might've just been another face. "it'll all be okay nessa, we'll figure it out? okay? i promise," he couldn't give her the identity of her baby's father, but, at least he could promise to be there for her.

he locked his eyes on hers when she looked up at him and he kept that small encouraging smile on his lips through the whole of it. "why would i mind? you're my friend. and friends are there for each other," he said in simple tones. and that really was as simply as he thought of it. friendship, it didn't have to be more complicated than that as far as dean was concerned. nessa was his friend, she needed someone to be there for her, he really didn't have anything better to do wit his time, so he would more than gladly take on the role of being there for his friend. because, that was what he was like. that was just what he did for those that he cared about. the peck on his lips sent his eyes wide for a moment as he looked at her, but then he smiles. "i'm gunna blame that on the hormones," he teased then bit the inside of his cheek.

the young man continued to hold her as she seemed to fall into her own mind, his fingers once again playing with her hair. he heard the small curse and knitted his brows for a moment looking at her in a concerned way. after chewing his lip for a few passing moments he let those same lips rest on her temple again. "you feel good enough to go lay down?" he ventured to ask, a sweet smile still on his lips.